TALES OF THE MOGGY HORDE
copyright 2002 Christy Marx


Thu, 03 Jan 2002 20:04:17 GMT

Last night, Randy and I were having our usual evening time on the sofa
with Unicom between us.  Uni was relaxed and happy.  Randy was giving
him hugs and kisses, marvelling at how calmly Uni accepts such things.

"He doesn't even mind me kissing him."

"Oh oh.  Watch out, Uni.  He's gay."

Whereupon, Unicom immediately jumped off the sofa and ran off.

We laughed until the tears were streaming down our faces.

Okay, so Uni often will unexpectedly decide to jump off the sofa and
grab a bite to eat (which he did).  It was just the *timing* of it
that was so hysterical.

================================
Fri, 04 Jan 2002 22:16:20 GMT

I just made a rather disturbing discovery while vacuuming my office --
a cat's fang.  Not just the tip either, the whole tooth all the way
down to the very root.

I've been grabbing cats one after another and doing a fang check.
What I've discovered is that Tosca has a badly broken fang I didn't
know about, but she's lost maybe 70% of the exposed fang, while this
is the whole thing well below the gum line.

Only a couple of cats have eluded me so far, but I have a hunch this
may be an old cat's tooth (it looks old) and perhaps it was lost by
Achilles before he disappeared.  Hard to know for sure.  It would mean
I had to have missed it when I vacuumed several times before this,
though it could have been lurking underneath the cardboard box it was
next to.

Achilles wasn't eating very well before he disappeared.  Losing a
tooth to this extreme would certainly go along with him having a
problem eating...though I think I would have noticed that.

================================
Sat, 05 Jan 2002 00:56:32 GMT

I found the suffering moggy and it's poor old Kate.  She has a
terribly sore hole where her right fang used to be.

Which also explains something else I was worrying about for the past
several days -- a slightly bloody-pus discharge from her right eye.
I've been watching it, debating whether it was something minor or
something that needed a vet visit and had just earlier today come down
on the side of a vet visit.

Now I know it must be part of an overall infection on that side of her
face, starting with the infection that destroyed the tooth.  I called
the vet immediately, but this late in the day on a Friday, it was
impossible to get her in.  I talked it over at length and we agreed I
can start her on Amoxicillin over the weekend.  If it's not looking
better by Mon., I'll have to bring her in.

All in all, she doesn't seem too sick.  She's not acting like a cat
with a bad fever or anything like that.  She ate some dry food a
little while ago, so I put out some canned food to help her along.

I notice she also has a small patch of fur scraped off her left front
leg.  Hmmm...wonder if there was a fight somewhere at the bottom of
all this?  I've never seen her fight, ever, but it's possible.

I commented to the clinician (who knows me well) that I had just
finished giving Diva her last pill today, so *naturally* I had to get
another cat that needs pills.  She laughed.

================================
Sun, 06 Jan 2002 06:18:17 GMT

Kate seems to be doing pretty well, though it takes all the years of
experience and practice I've acquired to get a pill into her.  But at
least once the pill is down, she's fine with it and is right back
purring in my face again.

I've decided to take her to the vet regardless.  I'm very concerned
about *why* her fang rotted away like that.  I think it would be
better to have all her teeth checked, in case there's some more
extensive problem I need to know about.

================================
Mon, 07 Jan 2002 04:41:45 GMT

Owl and Blue were going at it in the battle for dominance this
evening.  It's noisy and distracting and I'm not happy about it.

My dear old Querida is feeling slightly thinner and a little more
frail these days.  In a couple of months, she turns 17.  She's getting
up there.  She and son Tribble insist on following me up to the house,
then sitting around waiting for me to come out and back to the office
after lunch, no matter what the weather's doing (except for extremes).
Tribble whines a lot at the doors and windows, in case I forget
they're out there.

I'd say Tosca is probably the alpha female now, not that I've seen her
overtly asserting herself.  It's just the sense I get.  She's quite a
dominant female.  When she and daughter Diva play, they play *rough*.


================================
Tue, 08 Jan 2002 03:01:49 GMT

It was a tough day for poor Kate, stuffed into a carrier and hauled to
the vet's.  I am always amazed to hear an actual *voice* come out of
this cat when she's in a carrier.  It's the only time she emits more
than a tiny squeak.  She's not a full-voiced moggy like some others,
but she does have a Secret Voice which she saves for only the most
desperate occasions.

The vet poked, prodded, tapped her teeth, subjected her to a range of
torments which she took without a struggle and not the least sound,
even a squeak.  And she was very happy to hide in the carrier again.
She weighed in at a hefty 14 1/2 lbs.

The rest of her teeth look fine except for the one right next to the
fang she lost.  Swami says "there is a dental bill in your future."
It may be 6 months or 2 years or some other indeterminate time, but
sooner or later that tooth will go bad and need to be taken out.  I'll
just have to keep an eye on it.

Earlier in the afternoon, Diva played a game of catch & release with a
gopher.  I stepped out of my office and Diva was trotting up the
driveway with a mouthful of struggling gopher.  She dropped it, let it
threaten her for a while, then the gopher made a run for it.  Diva let
it get a good way down the driveway, then raced after it and trotted
back up the hill with it.  She repeated this ridiculous act a couple
more times, then let the damn thing escape down a hole. Tch tch.

================================
Thu, 10 Jan 2002 05:39:09 GMT

Artemis had an altercation with the water bowl this morning.  I heard
a PWANG KUHSPLOOSH!  The bowl was all but empty and the carpet was
soaked with half a gallon or so of water.  That girl has some strange
issues with water.

================================
Fri, 11 Jan 2002 19:40:28 GMT

Eating sounds finally penetrated my consciousness and I turned my
chair around just in time to see Theseus swallow the last of
something.  I have no idea what, except it was a critter of some kind,
maybe a lizard.  Not quite enough crunching to be a rodent.

These are the sort of things one learns having a horde of cats.

================================
Fri, 18 Jan 2002 05:20:08 GMT

I returned from lunch to find a large gopher head and one gopher foot
awaiting me on the office floor.  Good moggy, whoever it was.

================================
Wed, 23 Jan 2002 05:51:48 GMT

I have figured out why Theseus always wants me to let him in and out
of the door myself.  He is so broad in the beam, he's actually wider
than the cat door!  I saw him struggle to squeeze his bulk through the
cat door today and he barely made it.

================================
Sat, 26 Jan 2002 04:53:04 GMT

One of my cats, I think Tribble, has learned how to start the Norton
Virus Checker.  This is about the third time I've suddenly spotted an
unusual icon flashing on my status bar, opened it and discovered
Norton merrily checking its way through every file on my disk.

================================
Mon, 04 Feb 2002 05:29:41 GMT

I have two new reasons to worry about the cats being outside.

The neighbors at the bottom of my hill have a bunch of mutts and one
or more of them is coming all the way up here to my house.  Unicom is
extremely cautious about going outside these days and I'll bet that's
why.

The other reason is the presence of bobcat tracks.  We have lots of
mud now where we had to grade the road down to the new well. It's a
handy way to see what creatures are crossing the property.  We've
found a couple of sets of bobcat prints, as clear as can be in the
mud.  One set we found only a couple of days ago right next to my
cistern, which means they're not afraid of coming close to the house.

================================
Tue, 05 Feb 2002 02:36:59 GMT

We committed squirrel rescue today.  Randy came down to get me with
the news that Tribble had cornered what looked like a baby tree
squirrel.  I rounded up all the cats that were outside and finally
coaxed Tribble into the office.

With the moggies out of the way, we checked out the rockrose bush up
against the house, under Randy's office window.  It might have been a
ground squirrel, but it looked grayer that those usually do and it had
a fairly long tail.  So it was either a grayish ground squirrel, or a
young grey tree squirrel with spots.

We left him in peace for a while and when I checked later, he was
gone.

================================
Thu, 14 Feb 2002 22:59:29 GMT

I got fed up with seeing bald patches on Owl's back, so I hauled him
off to the vet's today.  Poor Owl.  He truly hates being put in that
carrier and taken to strange places.

I had to struggle to get the carrier onto the table and with good
reason.  Owl has gained weight.  He's up to a whopping 18 pounds!
That makes him the heavyweight of the Moggy Horde.

There's no way to figure out what's causing Owl's allergy.  Whatever
it is, it's chronic now.  He's had a cortisone shot and is going to be
on a light regimen of Prednisone to see if we can get him healed up.


I have become very creative about cat boxes.  When I moved most of the
cats into my office, I found the ultimate cat boxes -- the black
rubber/plastic utility tubs sold in the hardware store, the kind you
use to mix up a small batch of cement, that sort of thing.  They're
big, have rounded edges and low sides.  Ideal for large numbers of
cats.

This week, I put my attention on a new solution for the two house
cats.  We've had a regular sized cat box in the back hall and one in
the guest bathroom.  They weren't getting much use before, but Unicom
has become mostly in indoor cat now and that changed.

Having the cat box in the guest bathroom was rather unpleasant, plus
it's close to Randy's office and he's been having asthma problems from
the type of clumping litter I was using.

What I needed was one extra-large cat box of some kind that could fit
into a long narrow space in the back hallway.  I searched the hardware
store, but I found the solution by accident at the grocery store -- a
kid's plastic toboggan.  Rounded edges, tough plastic, long but
narrow.  It fit into that space perfectly.

And Randy pointed out that if we get enough snow, we can dump out the
litter and go sledding.  ;)

================================
Sat, 16 Feb 2002 19:21:15 GMT

I looked outside this morning and spotted a young orange tabby.  He
lives with my first neighbor on the hill, which is a fair distance
down from here.  Randy and I have tried to pet him during our walks,
but he's too shy.  He looks somewhat like a younger version of Unicom.

He was on the patio right next to the steps to the back deck, with his
tail all pouffed out.  Soon he ran off beneath the deck and we
discovered it was Nefreet who had been stalking him.  She has this
aggressive prance she does when she's being tough.  Then she stood
straight up on her hind legs like a meerkat.  She always amazes Randy
when she does this.  She can hold it for a long time, too.

There haven't been any altercations, so I'm guessing young mister
tabby beat a retreat home.  I hope he doesn't come around again and
get into fights with Uni.  Or Nefreet.  I can do without that
aggravation.

I'm worried about Querida.  She's been losing weight and suddenly
looks much older, plus she has that lump on her forehead.  She's
already booked for a trip to the vet on Mon.

================================
Tue, 19 Feb 2002 22:57:43 GMT

Querida and Unicom were loaded into their respective carriers late
yesterday afternoon and off we went.  We sang all the way into town.
Querida provided the main harmony in full voice while Unicom provided
syncopated accompaniment of his raspy "Ow! Ow! Ow!"  I joined in,
though I don't think my efforts were appreciated.  I was the only one
having fun.

Querida gets badly stressed out from being in a carrier.  She has what
would amount to a panic attack in a human.  She gets hot, she pants,
she sheds, and generally is deeply miserable, poor old girl.  Even
after the vet had spent some time going over her, she would continue
to break out in bursts of panting, which concerned the vet slightly.
Fortunately, I only see her do that if she's heavily exerted herself
and when she's stressed like this.

She's lost a couple of pounds, as I could tell.  He thinks the most
likely scenario is hyperthyroid, which is common in old cats.  He took
a blood panel, so I'll know by Thurs.  He's hoping that's what it is,
as it's easy to treat.

The lump on her forehead is benign, the same type of cyst her son,
Tribble had.  Because of her age, we're going to leave it be.

He also spotted a white "scar" of some kind on her left eye.  Because
she's so cross-eyed, it's nearly impossible to see it.  I'd never
spotted it before.  It could be an old scar or a cholesterol deposit.
He wasn't worried about it, but told me to try and check on it
periodically.

Unicom was up next.  He'd pissed all over himself and the carrier,
which was delightful.  The wonderful staff took the carrier away and
cleaned it.  Uni was mainly there for his 3-year rabies shot, but we
also wanted him to have a general check-up and a check on his joins.
He favors his right shoulder a lot.  As it turns out, there's
something wrong with the right shoulder.  The vet wasn't able to get
Uni to bend it nearly as well as the other.  It's hard to tell what
might be the cause.  Could be a touch of arthritis.  He recommended
baby aspirin twice a week.

They have recovered from their traumas and all is well.

Owl's back is slowly starting to look better.  Come Sunday, I start
him on the Prednisone.  If we're lucky, no more bald Siamese!

================================
Thu, 21 Feb 2002 01:27:58 GMT

The vet just called with the results of Querida's blood tests.  Her
thyroid levels are way up there, but the kidneys look fine. My days of
cat-pilling freedom are over.  I have to give her thyroid-blocking
pills twice a day. Ah, well, she's worth it.

================================
Sat, 23 Feb 2002 19:26:31 GMT

Querida's being very good about the pills.  No hassle so far.  And she
seems to be doing well.  The doctor warned the thyroid blocker could
make her go off her food at first, but she seems as interested as
ever.

Which reminds me, must get to the feed store and buy more cat food
today!

================================
Mon, 25 Feb 2002 06:09:44 GMT

It was a day of pillage.

Unicom got his baby aspirin (he gets that twice a week now).

Querida got her pills.

Owl got his pill.

I told Randy to watch out or I might pill him by accident.

================================
Tue, 26 Feb 2002 04:59:44 GMT

Theseus is a big, silly tugboat of a cat.  As soon as I try to comb
out Tribble or Kate or anybody else, Theseus is right in there
demanding to get his share of attention, except that he gets royally
snarked at me when I try to actually deal with his dreadlocks. His
long fur is hell to keep unmatted during the winter.

Tribble and Kate both love being combed.  They stand there and purr
and don't budge an inch.  I don't comb them nearly enough.
Fortunately, the rest of the Horde is short-haired enough to not
really need it.

================================
Wed, 27 Feb 2002 22:33:52 GMT

As we sat eating breakfast, we heard the unique "Brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrt"
machinegun sound of the roadrunner.

He was perched on the corner of the railing on the back deck and he
was apparently giving Nefreet a warning or lecture.  She was crouched
on the deck watching the roadrunner, which is easily as big as she is,
with no small amount of trepidation.

The roadrunner then trotted down the railing, flew up to the peak of
my house, trotted along the top peak and dove down the other side of
the house.  Nefreet turned tail and slunk into the house.

================================
Thu, 28 Feb 2002 01:03:01 GMT

I was having the most bizarre computer problem.  Suddenly, I couldn't
get the left or right mouse buttons to work properly.  Not on the
mouse, but on the screen.  Dialog boxes or other things would flash on
and off the screen instead of letting me click on them.  Icons
wouldn't respond at all.

It was driving me nuts.  I rebooted and rebooted.  I gnashed my teeth
and pulled out my hair trying to debug the problem.  Then I
realized...

Owl was sleeping on the "escape" key.

========
Thu, 07 Mar 2002 00:48:31 GMT

Poor Querida is snurfling and wheezing worse than when I took her in.
She seems to be doing fine with the thyroid control medication.  Her
appetite is good and all that.

I called the vet to ask what to do about the snurfling and he had me
buy some Chlor-trimetron, the same stuff I take at night -- a standard
over-the-counter anit-histamine.  I'm to give her half a tablet of the
4mg dosage twice a day.

Great.  Four pills a day.  Like she isn't already avoiding me like the
plague as it is.

Owl is sitting to the left of my keyboard with his back to me.  He's
been sitting there like that for about ten minutes, sharing his large
impressive back with me.  Impressive except for the ratty part where
he pulls the fur out.  He's plotting something, that's my guess.  Now
that I'm onto his escape key trick, he's thinking of the next way he
can subtly torment me as pay-back for going to the vet and having to
take pills.

========
Fri, 08 Mar 2002 19:17:30 GMT

I wondered why I was having trouble with my phone headset, why the
sound kept shorting out.  Finally, it went totally dead.  I tested it
out on another phone. No good.

I had already forgotten my FIRST RULE: First look to see what the cats
did.

They chewed through the wires.  I mean, what cat could resist a nice
piece of floppy black wire?

========
Sun, 10 Mar 2002 00:09:34 GMT

Owl's trying to pull his escape key trick again, but I'm onto him now.

========
Sun, 10 Mar 2002 00:13:04 GMT

Querida made a new and determined effort to avoid me this morning. As
soon as she sees me, she begins slinking around the office making me
follow her around and around.  This usually continues until she
finally decides to try out a hiding spot and that's when I'm able to
catch her.

But this morning, she flattened herself out and squeezed into an
itty-bitty space between the top of a box of comics and the shelf
above it.  You just can't believe how flat a cat can get until you see
one do this.  Luckily, all I had to do was pull the box out from under
her and she was mine to torment!  Uh, I mean, I was able to give her
the morning pills.

========
Sun, 17 Mar 2002 05:36:39 GMT

The past few days, Querida has made mostly half-hearted attempts to
elude me.  I think she's realized it's inevitable.

I can't quite decide whether the Prednisone is doing Owl any good at
all.  His back looks as patchy as ever, though it's possible some of
the hair is growing back and it's just taking a long time.

The rest of the moggies are good.  Theseus is sporting more and more
dreadlocks on his hindquarters and refuses to let me work on them.  I
can't believe what a mess he becomes in the winter.

There are heaps of them sleeping head to butt and back to back next to
the heater at the moment while Kate settles in on the printer and
Tribble props himself against the scanner to have a bath.

========
Sun, 17 Mar 2002 23:27:03 GMT

I noticed today that Querida is improving from the thryoid control
meds. She's put on some weight and her coat looks better.  She's
looking more like her sturdier self.

========
Thu, 21 Mar 2002 18:59:11 GMT

Querida goes to the vet today for a recheck on her thyroid.  I hate
having to do it to her because she gets so stressed going in the
carrier.

I also need to talk to the vet about Owl, since the Prednisone doesn't
seem to be helping his skin problem. Sigh...

========
Fri, 22 Mar 2002 03:26:28 GMT

Querida occupied the passenger's seat so she could see me.  She
complained plaintively the entire way.  Owl's carrier had to go on the
back seat.  He only make an occasional weak noise.

At the Torture House...umm...at the vet's, Querida weighed in at 9 3/4
lbs. which is excellent.  She's already gained back a whole pound
since starting the thyroid therapy.  They drew the blood for a
recheck, but it'll be a few days before they have the results. 

The vet and I conferred long and hard over Owl's mysterious problem.
Given how long he's been denuding the fur from his back end, and the
lack of results with cortisone and Prednisone so far, both of us are
leaning more and more heavily in the direction of obsessive neurotic
behavior.

First, though, we're going to increase the Prednisone for a couple of
weeks to see whether we get any results at all.  We recalled what a
stuggle it was to get Diva over her skin problems.

If that still doesn't help, I'll wean him the Pred and consider what
to do next.  The vet mentioned a form of kitty Prozac, but neither he
nor I like that option very much.

========
Fri, 22 Mar 2002 04:00:05 GMT

Guess what I discovered?  Owl's desire to eat plastic bags has a name.
Here's what I found at:

http://www.healthypet.com/Library/pet_behavior-17.htm
------------------------------------------------------------

Does your cat nibble your wool sweaters down to fuzzy nubs? If he
does, you're not alone. Enough animals eat nonfood materials that the
behavior has been given a name-pica. While pica generally isn't
dangerous, it can cause intestinal obstructions if your cat eats too
much. It also can mean the destruction of blankets, clothing,
furniture, and more if it's not controlled. 

Pica is defined as an abnormal compulsion to eat things that aren't
usually eaten. It occurs rarely in humans, usually kids who eat the
occasional handful of dirt. It's also a relatively rare phenomenon in
dogs. Some cats, however-particularly Oriental breeds like Siamese and
Burmese-will repeatedly chow on everything from phone cords to shower
curtains, though their most common snack is wool and other fabrics. 

Why?

There are several theories on why cats like to chew on wool and other
materials. Some behaviorists and veterinarians believe that it starts
when kittens are weaned too early or too abruptly. The kittens then
suck on fabric to soothe themselves; the sucking gradually turns into
chewing. Other veterinary specialists think that dietary deficiencies,
such as a lack of fat or insoluble fiber, drive cats to seek the
missing nutrients in strange foods. Eating inappropriate things may
also be a result of stress, anxiety, or boredom. Neurological
disorders and illnesses such as pancreatitis can also cause this
behavior. Pica may even be caused by a combination of two or more of
these factors.

========
Mon, 25 Mar 2002 22:23:24 GMT

While Randy and I were gone over the weekend, Unicom and Nefreet had
to be locked in the house together.  This is bad enough when we're
around, but when we're gone it must be a pure torment for them.

They always get wild and crazy when we come home.  Last night, they
decided to burn off that extra energy by fighting with one another.
It's over very own private Middle East in the living room.

========
Wed, 27 Mar 2002 19:44:08 GMT

The vet called to say that Querida's recheck on the thyroid came out
low this time, so I can cut back to giving her only one pill a day.  I
was hoping for that, as she really hates these pills and has taken to
avoiding me.  I don't want my poor old girl to avoid me!

Owl also hates taking pills.  Yesterday morning, he nearly bowled me
over as he made a mad dash out the door to freedom before I could give
him a pill.  Fortunately, I was able to casually stroll up to him a
few minutes later and perform a surprise pill-otomy.  There is no
escape, not even in the great outdoors.

Last night, Randy and I were relaxing on the sofa with Unicom in his
usual place between us, and Nefreet curled up to my right.  A coyote
suddenly yowled quite close by, as they often do.  Both cats
immediately jumped up and growled.  Unicom then ran up to the loft to
hide.  Nefreet ran over to the glass doors to glare at the night.

I think if they were ever unlucky enough to confront a coyote while
outside, Unicom would wisely go up the nearest tree, while Nefreet
would try to beat the crap out of the coyote.  She is so nuts.

========
Thu, 28 Mar 2002 05:34:48 GMT

I've decided that Theseus' true name is Sherman, because he's built
like a Sherman Tank -- wide, heavy and dense.

========
Mon, 01 Apr 2002 00:05:32 GMT

Uni caught his first gopher of spring last night.  He ate the front
half and we left the rest on the back deck in case the roadrunner came
around looking for breakfast.  Apparently, the roadrunner didn't make
his rounds and the gopher parts were still waiting for me this
morning.  Ah, the joys...

Theseus is such a clown.  He loves to be combed until I try to work
through the matted tangles at his butt end.  Then he dances around
until I give up, but the minute I turn to walk away, he lashes out and
whacks me with a swat to the leg.  This little ritual is repeated
until I've had enough.

========
Tue, 02 Apr 2002 02:19:20 GMT

I looked out the dining room glass doors and saw the roadrunner on the
deck.  Then I was Blue in stalking mode.  The roadrunner jumped onto
the rail and Blue eagerly followed along, watching him from the deck.

I decided to step outside to make sure Blue didn't get lucky, but the
roadrunner had it well in hand...er, wing.  He simply jump-flew onto
the roof, leaving a frustrated cat behind.  I suspect he was never
very worried.

Poor Diva is suffering from springtime allergies. Her eyes run and run
and ooze liquid.  I have some drops for her.  By Bast, she *hates*
that.  It's better than runny eyes, though.

========
Fri, 05 Apr 2002 19:45:18 GMT

The Gopher Slayer Brigade was in good form yesterday.  I came out of
my office to find Tosca crouched over a fresh gopher, though she
walked off after sniffing it and Theseus was right there, too.  He's
such a good hunter, it may have been his kill.  Or hers.  Hard to say.

Then Uni caught another one last night.  He left a pile of guts and a
hind piece on the back deck.  Something cleaned up up the
hindquarters.  I'm hoping it was the roadrunner.  But lucky me got to
clean up the pile of guts.

I'm so pleased with how much better Querida looks now.  She's back to
a normal weight, her coat is full and soft again, and she's acting
more like her old self.  She seems to have resigned herself to the
morning pill and hasn't made me chase her for a while.

I think I'm seeing some improvement in Owl's back.  His fur grows
rather slowly, making it hard to be sure, but it does look like it's
growing back.

========
Thu, 11 Apr 2002 17:51:12 GMT

A pretty good gopher tally:

Tosca - 2

Knobby - 1

Knobby just finished crunching his up to the left of me in the office.
I can see he left me tidbits to clean up.

Go, moggies!

========
Fri, 12 Apr 2002 19:24:50 GMT

Blasted Artemis has been playing her water games.  Twice this week
I've come down to the office to find the carpet soaked and the large
water bowl almost totally empty.  I'm not sure how she accomplishes
this.  It's a large metal bowl, so it's not lightweight.  It's never
turned over.  But the water has been removed down to the bottom all
the same.

This means *all* the cats went without water for Bast knows how long,
depending on when during the night Miss Thumbs committed her liquid
pillaging.

It's not doing wonders for the carpet, either.

I'm wedging it with bricks to see if this helps.

========
Sat, 13 Apr 2002 04:39:03 GMT

I've been too busy to mention the stray cat.

It was two days ago.  I noticed that Nefreet was acting oddly on the
back deck.  She was in stalk and defense mode.

I went over to the dining room doors and saw a handsome young tomcat
perched on the back deck.  He was your standard gray&brown tabby, not
very big yet, but in good shape and very definitely a tom.

Nefreet was searing him with her blinkless laser vision.  Young Tom
was arching, expanding, doing the defense thing but not with any
vicious intent.

When I stepped outside, I expected him to take off, but he didn't.  He
let me come right over and made no hostile moves toward me even while
in defensive posture.  After we hustled Nefreet inside, Tom instantly
relaxed and let me pet him all up.  He rubbed my legs and was as sweet
as anything.  This was a very well socialized cat, one that must have
been around people a lot.

But I knew he didn't come from any of my neighbors, which means he
made a long trek from somewhere.  He may have been driven off by a
more aggressive tom of one of the dozens of mangy dogs down below.

I had Randy bring out the carrier.  Tom went right up to it and stuck
his head in, which made it easy to get the rest of him inside.  He was
totally calm.  He didn't freak, panic, scream or even get terribly
upset.

I called my vet's and arranged to bring him in instantly.  He curled
up in the back of the carrier and didn't make a peep.  I left him to
be fixed and picked him up yesterday.

Once again, he was completely calm and quiet.  My first neighbor on
the hill, who has a couple of outdoor cats, agreed to take him.  I had
a very hard time forcing myself to leave the cat there.  I made Randy
a promise to whittle down the Horde to a more manageable size, but
damn, this was such a nice cat.

Anyway, we took him into the garage/workshop where my neighbor keeps
the cat food.  Tom let us pet him up, then wandered around, not
terribly upset about anything.

I meant to call and ask how he was doing today, but got too busy.  I
figure he'll either hang around there and I'll see him from time to
time, or he'll find his way home minus some of his apparatus and less
inclined to roam the next time.

========
Wed, 17 Apr 2002 04:41:34 GMT

I stopped by my neighbor's house today to see how it was doing with
the gray tabby I left there.  My neighbor said he kept the cat inside
for a couple of days, but as soon as he opened the door, it took off.
I hope he found his way home.

========
Wed, 17 Apr 2002 18:08:20 GMT

We had some rain last night, but Unicom was wired up and determined to
be outside.  He said in the dry section under the eaves on the back
deck, his senses attuned to the night.  He ignored all offers to let
him back inside.

I said to Randy, "Uni wants a soggy gopher."

I went outside a few minutes later and he was nowhere in sight.  I
stood on the deck smelling the fresh scent of the rain for a minute,
when I suddenly heard one, short SQUEAK!  Immediately afterwards, Uni
trotted out from under the deck with a fresh gopher to chow down.

He still didn't want to come in after that.  Eventually, I had to
stalk him to the end of the deck and grab him before he could jump off.
The Gopher Lust was upon him.

This morning, I found a poor, drowned lizard waiting for me in the
cats' water bowl.

========
Fri, 19 Apr 2002 18:44:31 GMT

For a change of pace, Uni caught a mouse last night, which he
decapitated.  The roadrunner apparently had the rest for breakfast.

========
Sun, 21 Apr 2002 18:55:35 GMT

Uni left the roadrunner half a gopher for breakfast.  The roadrunner
has taken to hanging out on the roof.  I heard his distinct "brrrrrrt"
call this morning.  When I went onto the back deck, he launched from a
big oak tree and glided away for a long distance.  That's the most
time I've seen a roadrunner spend off the ground.

Tribble had a gopher for brunch, here in the office, of course.

========
Fri, 26 Apr 2002 18:29:12 GMT

Cat Door Antics.

I now realize why Theseus will wait and wait for me to let him in or
out of the door.  I watched him come in the cat door this morning.
About halfway through, he had to squeeze and struggle and wiggle to
get the rest of his chunky self inside.

Owl, who is a larger cat than Theseus overall, makes elegant jumps
through the cat door.  The problem Theseus has is that he's a
wide-load cat.

Artemis hardly ever goes outside anymore.  She used to love the
outdoors, but now she hardly budges outside except to go a few feet
outside when I'm holding the door open.  She only wants to snatch a
mouthful of grass and that's it.  I suspect the real reason is that
she's too fat to use the cat door and doesn't like getting trapped
outside.

What she will do instead is pry open the flap and stick her head out.
That way she can watch the outside world while the rest of her ample
self is safely inside.

========
Sun, 28 Apr 2002 18:35:58 GMT

Diva has caught herself a cute little Diva-sized gopher and is running
around the office with it, growling and hissing just in case another
moggy should even think of taking it away from her.

========
Fri, 03 May 2002 00:51:53 GMT

My office has stacks of empty boxes.  Well, some are empty, some
contain packing material such as styrofoam peanuts or air-pocket
cushions.  Some used to contain peanuts which were then scattered
hither and anon by Owl and other culprits.

Anyway, lots of boxes.  I heard a suspicious sound coming from one box
that seemed pretty well closed.  I went over, pried up one flap and
gleaming golden eyeball looked back at me.  It was Diva, who had
efficiently boxed herself up and seemed quite happy about it, so I put
the flap down and left her to contemplate whatever mischief she will
get up to next.

========
Sat, 04 May 2002 21:12:14 GMT

I came out of my office to an incredibly funny tableau.

As I stepped up toward the road, I saw Querida, Theseus, and Blue
lying across the road in a line, with their attention riveted up the
road.

I looked and fifteen feet or so up the road stood the Roadrunner,
facing off with the line of cats.  He didn't seem excessively
bothered, even when I appeared.  As I began my walk up the road, he
considered his options, gave me a Roadrunner raspberry (Brrrttttt!),
and flew into the nearest oak tree.

========
Thu, 16 May 2002 00:35:27 GMT

The Sad Saga of the Unfortunate Owl

When I left home Sun. morning, Owl seemed fine.  I guess I didn't look
hard enough.

When I got home late Mon. afternoon and began giving the moggies their
"Hi, I'm back" scritchies, it was instantly apparent that Owl had a
big abscess on his right cheek, almost under his chin.  I cleaned the
area with hydrogen peroxide, hoping I could reopen the wound myself,
but no such luck.  He was hurting and that original injury had closed
up too well.

That left me just barely enough time to cram the unhappy boy into a
carrier and race into town to catch the vet before the office closed.
I felt so bad having to come home after being gone, give him a few
pets, torture him, then abandon him overnight for more torments.

He's a Frankenstein cat, with a tube in his cheek, but glad to be
home.  I was surprised that after all that, last night he still came
around and begged for love and attention.  I am forgiven.  

Or was.  That may be past tense, since this morning I had to shove an
amoxicillin down his throat and clean the wound, and will have to do
that twice a day for a week or so.  I suspect Owl's forgiveness won't
last that long.

========
Sat, 18 May 2002 04:46:28 GMT

Somewhere in my office, there is a large, doomed lizard.

I knew there had to be something because Blue was going berserk this
afternoon, romping through a pile of old cardboard sheets.  I finally
went over to investigate, but couldn't find the object of his
interest.

Later, I went to pick up some of the scattered cardboard and the large
lizard skittered across my foot and raced for the small space
underneath a large tool chest cabinet.  Instantly, a half a dozen very
interested moggies honed in.  I looked for the poor thing, hoping to
rescue it, but it's vanished.

Which means it's doomed.  Either a cat will eventually get it, or it
will dry up and become yet another petrified lizard carcass to be
found one day when we finally move out of here.

========
Sat, 18 May 2002 18:28:45 GMT

Randy and I stood on the back deck enjoying the stars last night.  The
quiet of the night was interrupted by a wild rustling in the tall
grasses, followed by the pathetic "WEEJ! WEEJ!  WEEJ!" death cries of
a gopher.  Unicom proudly trotted up to the deck to show off his
catch, then retired to the patio to eat it.  We were thankful we were
out of hearing range when he began crunching.

I was told that Owl's "drain pipe" could come up in about three days.
It was only a bit of rubber tubing which they'd tied in a knot, so I
figured I could spare Owl and myself another trip into town.  I
snipped apart the knot and it came out easily.  After a few dabs of
peroxide, he was done.  He even paused to sniff at the tubing, rather
than running full tilt to escape, so it couldn't have been too bad.

He's been very good about taking his pills, though when he decides to
squirm, he's a major handful.  I looked at what he weighed when I
brought him in this last time and he's up to a hulkish 18.7 pounds!  I
should probably put him on a diet, but there's no way to do that
without putting all the cats on a diet.

========
Tue, 21 May 2002 04:35:24 GMT

When I opened the office door, the usual batch of moggies ran up to
get outside, apparently oblivious to the fact that it had been raining
all morning.

Tosca crashed to a stop at the threshold, saw the vast wetness
outside, let loose with a verbal insult in meowese and came right back
in.  Tribble and Theseus stood just outside the door thinking about
it, but after a minute, they turned around in disgust and came inside.

So no moggies went outside today.  Which is just as well, because if
they do go outside on a wet day, they delight in tramping with their
wet muddy paws all over my desk.

========
Sat, 25 May 2002 04:31:06 GMT

I only had one pill left to give to Owl.  One of the tricks I've been
using to catch him is to stand next to the door when I'm letting the
other mogs out first thing in the morning  Owl eventually makes a run
for the door and I nab him.

But he anticipated me this time.  He put on a spurt of speed coupled
with his most effective Slippery Force Field, and got right past me.

No problem.  He always comes back inside later, so I gave it to him
then.  He can delay, but he can't escape.

Next up, I discovered poor little Diva has a puncture wound
immediately above her right eye.  It was still open, so I was able to
clean it out, and it's a bony area so not likely to abscess.  sigh...

We have taken to referring to Nefreet as Unicom's Doorbell.  Uni seems
to have figured out that if he picks on Nefreet and gets her to yowl
loudly enough, we will come running and open the door, whereupon Uni
can stroll inside.

========
Sun, 26 May 2002 20:57:43 GMT

We had a strange experience with Unicom during lunch.

It's a fairly common routine for us to sit on the couch and eat lunch
off tv tables while we catch up on some news.  Frequently, Uni gets on
the sofa between us.  He loves to knead and drool, so Randy has an old
towel that he folds up and places on his leg.  We jokingly call it
Uni's security blanket.  Uni will happily knead for a few minutes,
then usually curl up for a nap.

That's what he did. He was curled up, seemingly asleep and content,
when he suddenly jolted upright, acting as though something was
terribly wrong.  We muted the tv, but couldn't detect anything.  I
guess Randy somehow moved the blanket slightly and instantly Uni was
in full battle mode -- puffed out to HERE!  He watched that blanket as
though it were a coiled rattlesnake.  He delivered a lightning fast
killing blow with his right paw -- WHAP!! -- and retreated to the back
of the sofa.

I could see he was completely freaked out.  When I tried to pet him,
he jumped to the floor where he delivered a whap to the sofa.  He
slowly came around to the front where he kept his distance, while
sniffing the air intently.  Randy laid the towel flat on the floor as
we tried soothe Uni, but he wasn't having any part of it.

Nefreet watched the whole thing from a distance, then came and touched
noses with Uni.  She clearly couldn't figure out what the fuss was
about.

My guess is that he had a nightmare and didn't fully wake up enough at
first to tell the difference between the dream and reality.  He did
finally calm down and was anxious to go outside, where he seems fine,
if a bit disgruntled. 

I've never see him do anything quite like that before.  It was very
odd.

========
Thu, 06 Jun 2002 04:12:05 GMT

Nefreet welcomed us home from the daily errands with a dead lizard in
the dining room.

It's been so hot, even my sturdiest moggies haven't done much romping
outside.  Theseus is down to his summer coat which is a relief for me.
He only gets the serious dreadlocks when he has his winter coat.  His
summer coat is shorter and much easier to care for.

========
Thu, 06 Jun 2002 18:55:10 GMT

I had a close call.  The moggies could have burned my office down.

Usually at night I leave a small fan running next to one of the
windows.  This is a very small fan that I had mounted on an old camera
tripod.

Something -- I'm guessing a cat -- knocked it over during the night.
The fan fell face-forward, knocking the protective grill off so that
the fan blades ground to a halt in the carpet.  But of course, the fan
motor kept trying to run.

When I found it, the motor was burning hot.  Luckily, nothing
combustible came in contact with it during the night.

========
Sun, 09 Jun 2002 18:05:50 GMT

Owl has taken to long meditation on the doorstep.

He does this specifically when I've opened the door for him and am
standing there holding it open while he thinks and ponders and thinks
and ponders upon that most difficult of cat philosophical questions:
"Will I enter this door?  Or will I sit here forever?"

========
Sat, 15 Jun 2002 04:41:04 GMT

Owl decided to use a variation of his "sleep on the escape key" trick
tonight. Since I've been foiling the escape key trick, he decided to
sleep on the other side of the keyboard where he can craftily hit the
sleep mode key with his foot.  Sigh...

He and a couple other cats were peacefully asleep until I sneezed.
Then they vaporized.  I had no idea a mere sneeze could be so
terrifying. If they were cars, you'd label them as 0 to 90 in a split
second.

========
Sun, 16 Jun 2002 04:17:47 GMT

Tribble had me terribly worried this afternoon.  He went out in the
morning as usual, but then didn't show up in his usual places at the
usual time.  He didn't answer my call in the office, so I went hunting
and calling for him outside.

I made a more thorough search of the office and finally found him
utterly ignoring me, tucked away in a crate under a towel beneath a
pile of boxes.  Yeesh.

Only much later did he come out to greet me and I have to say he
doesn't look like he feels very well. There might be a trip to the vet
in his near future.  I'm beginning to wonder if he suffers from the
same thyroid problem as his mother.  He's getting that lean and
scruffy look that she had.

========
Mon, 17 Jun 2002 05:09:07 GMT

Tribble was back to his usual self today.  Maybe he just had an off
day, or ate something that disagreed with him (and I don't want to
think about what that could be).

I just had to rescue yet another tiny lizard, one that had lost its
tail in the past and was starting to regrow it.  Tosca flushed it out
and was kind enough to let me have it while it was still undamaged.

========
Fri, 21 Jun 2002 05:23:26 GMT

This isn't about the Horde, per se, but it does involve a feline.

We saw my petsitter as we were driving to the post office.  She
stopper her car and gestured for us to come over.  Fortunately, this
was in a large, mostly empty parking lot.

She opened the cat carrier on the seat next to her and brought out a
tiny, 4-day old kitten, eyes still closed, mewing piteously.  It was a
little Unicom.  Someone found it in her driveway and brought it into
the vet clinic where Tisa works.  Naturally, Tisa ended up with it
(she who already has about 50 cats and feeds nearly every stray in
town).  Poor little guy is so tiny, but if anyone can save it, I'd bet
on Tisa.

I may be a servant of Bast, but Tisa is a High Priestess.

========
Tue, 25 Jun 2002 20:39:14 GMT

Having now seen LILO AND STITCH, I think I can safely say that Nefreet
is the feline version of Stitch: small, smart, occasionally
affectionate, otherwise testy, defiant and frequently nuts.

========
Wed, 26 Jun 2002 05:05:03 GMT

I was about to head out the door this afternoon to run a large batch
of errands in town when Nefreet began to howl. Randy and I rushed into
the back hall where Nefreet was running, yowling, stopping to bite at
her rear end, then running, yowling, stop to bite, etc.

The last time I saw her exhibit this behavior, I had to rush her to
the vet who extracted a foxtail from her vagina.  (For those who don't
know, a "foxtail" is a native grass that grows everywhere around here
and sheds infinite numbers of sharp, spear-like seeds we call
foxtails, which are designed to pierce then burrow.  They pierce and
burrow with hideous effect into dogs and cats, everything from between
the toes to in the eyes.  Unicom nearly lost an eye that way. They are
horrible things.)

So we scooped her into the carrier, I notified the vet I was on the
way and off I went.  I dropped her off around 3:30, and came back
after doing all my errands at 4:45 to learn, a) there as no way
Nefreet was going to cooperate, so they had to give her happy gas, and
b) they didn't find a blasted thing wrong.  Either she got rid of
whatever was hurting her before I got her to the vet, or perhaps she
had been stung or something temporary that couldn't be detected.  The
vet scoped her, examined her and couldn't find any health problems,
except for a rather bloated belly (which she always has).

On the one hand, I'm glad she was all right.  On the other hand, it
cost me $99 to find that out.  That's one hell of an expensive false
alarm.

I swear, it must be revenge for calling her Ms. Stitch.

========
Fri, 28 Jun 2002 18:20:52 GMT

Owl had decided that shredding the flattened pile of stored cardboard
boxes is just the coolest thing a Siamese can do.  Consequently, I now
have shreds of cardboard added to the decor of the office.

Said decor being Casual Cat Debris a la Mess.

========
Sat, 29 Jun 2002 18:00:24 GMT

The moggies have created a couple of favorite dirt bath locations
outside the office.  Obviously, something about rolling around in fine
powdery dirt feels *wonderful* to cats.  It wreaks havoc on my desk,
but oh, well.

This morning I happened to see Theseus happily rolling around with
Tribble lying nearby batting at Theseus' tail and feet.  I thought,
"How cute.  Tribble is playing with Theseus."  Then I realized Tribble
was actually, in his laid-back way, telling Theseus to get the hell
out of *his* dirt bath.  Theseus quickly got the message, leapt up and
ran off, whereupon Tribble instantly dived in and started rolling.

========
Wed, 03 Jul 2002 03:20:06 GMT

We stepped outside onto the back deck to say hello to Uni, who was
lounging there, when I realized the roadrunner was on the deck with
us, only about 7 feet away.  We talked to him and he went
"brrrrrttt!!!" to us.  He walked along the railing toward the patio,
taking his time, not in the least intimidated by us.

Nefreet appeared on the patio.  She saw the roadrunner, froze in
place, and began making her "birdie!" chatter noises.  The roadrunner
utterly ignored her.  He hopped down onto the patio, walked around her
within a few feet and picked a couple of beetles off the adobe bricks.
Nefreet wisely did nothing.

But catching the beetles got Uni's attention.  He crept down the steps
toward the roadrunner, who hardly cared.  When Uni got too close, the
roadrunner trotted off and stood on the corner of the railroad ties at
the far end of the patio.

That happens to be Uni's favorite spot.  He loves to lie there and
look over the valley below.  He kept pretending he was about to make a
leap for the roadrunner, wiggling his butt and making feints.
Eventually, the roadrunner decided enough was enough and hopped off
into the oak tree.  Uni settled into "his" spot.

Those birds know no fear.

========
Thu, 04 Jul 2002 05:28:51 GMT

Big Cat day.

I was coming home from running errands in town around noon.  As I
passed my first neighbor's house (first house on the hill), a large,
lanky, dark brown mottled bobcat loped across the road in front of me.

Around 7:30, Randy was coming home from town and as he got to bottom
of our driveway (where it splits from the road), he saw a cougar
walking up the middle of the road.  It headed down toward the canyon
on the north side of my property.

I'm so jealous.  Everybody around here has seen a cougar except me.

========
Sat, 27 Jul 2002 05:18:29 GMT

When we got home from the two-week absence, the moggies were very
happy to see us.  Unicom has been very glad to have his people back.
He's now making a regular habit of sleeping much of the day at Randy's
feet under Randy's desk.  Here's poor Randy with his long, long legs
already at a disadvantage, but he loves that cat so much, he doesn't
care.  He loves having him there.

Many weeks ago, Unicom had that weird nightmare or whatever it was the
spooked him so badly while he was sleeping on the sofa between the two
of us. Since that time, we'd had no luck at all coaxing him back into
that spot.  He would lie on a table right behind the sofa to be close
to us, but wouldn't get back on the sofa.  But since we've come back,
he's voluntarily returned to his old spot between us on the sofa, back
to the drooling and kneading like before.  *That's* how happy he is to
have us back, I think.

Nefreet was also a very happy girl.  Long minutes passed before she
got around to biting me.

When I went down to my office, I was mobbed by most of the Horde,
especially the affectionate ones like Tribble, Theseus, Sly and Tosca.
Most of the rest followed in a second wave with a few exceptions.
Querida, I suspect, simply doesn't hear very well these days, so I
don't think she even realized I'd come in until I came over to the
desk where she was lying.  She accepted the affection, but I could see
the wheels turning in her little furry head -- she feared I was going
to give her a pill and she'd better escape.  Which she did as soon as
she could.  She still *hates* getting that thyroid pill every morning.

Owl sat up on a high spot and looked down upon me, not deigning to
forgive me right way for abandoning him for two whole weeks.  My
coaxing fell on deaf ears.

I couldn't find Artemis either.  I figured she probably forgot who I
was.  So it seemed, until I got around to cleaning the cat boxes.
Suddenly she remembered and appeared for her round of petting.

Owl did finally decide to forgive me and demanded his share of the
attention.  He's gotten slightly more talkative lately, not that he
has much of a voice.  He's just using it more.

Diva and Tosca sang and yodeled.  Diva had a bite on her shoulder that
looked rather nasty.  I cleaned it up, whereupon she was careful not
to let me get within reach of her for days.  Fortunately, it didn't
abscess.

I looked out the dining room doors the other morning and saw that
Unicom was hunched on the deck in an entranced pose, staring at the
patio.  I went over to a window to see what had him so interested.  It
was a pair of bunnies grazing on the clover that grows between the
adobe paving stones.  Uni made no attempt to go after them.  He's
nearing the end of his hunting days, I suspect, though I'm sure he'll
continue to catch gophers now and then.  But he has a bad shoulder
that makes him limp heavily (he gets baby aspirin twice a week for
that) and we suspect he has a depth perception problem.

Many years back, he very nearly lost one eye to an infection brought
on by getting a foxtail in his eye, then being treated with medication
to which he was allergic.  Although it miraculously healed up, that
eye has always been more clouded than his other.  We notice that when
he's on the back of the sofa, he is uncertain of the depth to the seat
of the sofa, even though it's only a short distance.  We also notice
that he lands damned heavily from even short jumps.  That doesn't help
his shoulder either.  I hate to think of it, but he's getting older.

Aren't we all?

========
Sun, 28 Jul 2002 18:03:33 GMT

I have all the materials relating to my current writing project
cleverly organized into handy three-ring binders.

Which I keep lying next to my keyboard for quick reference.

Which Owl has decided are the perfect bed.  Just his size, nice and
sloped, obviously comfy.

Anybody want to hazard a guess I often I get to use my reference?

========
Wed, 31 Jul 2002 21:13:12 GMT

Back in mid-April, a lovely young dark tabby tomcat showed up at the
house.  He was friendly and sweet and I had no clue where he came
from.  I had him fixed, then took him to my first neighbor on the
hill.  A week later, I asked after him and my neighbor said the cat
had taken off and not come back.

He showed up this morning on the back deck, outside our bedroom doors.
I wasn't sure at first.  When I went out, I walked slowly toward him
and as I got close, I knelt down.  He came right over, rubbed
vigorously all over me, rolled at my feet and made a total lover-boy
of himself.  I took a look and yup, I'm pretty sure it's the same boy.
He was in excellent condition--clean, healthy, obviously getting food.

Then Unicom and Nefreet got out. Unicom went into Giant Inflation
Mode, growled, was ready to rumble.  Nefreet is always ready to
rumble, of course.  Tabby-boy puffed up and growled back.  I grabbed
the tabby-boy firmly by the scruff, held him and carried him past his
enemies.  He was very good about it.  I headed down the driveway and
relaxed my grip.  He didn't struggle or panic.  He snuggled onto my
shoulder.  I set him down by my office, figuring he could find his way
back to wherever he was living from there.  After a few minutes, he
began to make his way through the grasses and down the hill.

If I didn't have so many in the Horde, I'd adopt him in a heartbeat.

I just realized I missed Owl's anniversary.  He arrived in my care on
7/24/97.  Wow, it's been five years!  He's nine years old now,
roughly, so he's been with me over half his life.  How strange. It
occurs to me that Randy may be the first man he's gotten to know.
Since Jo was a single woman and the people caretaking the cats while
Jo was in the hospital were mostly female (I think), it's possible
he's only known women. The cool thing is that Owl really likes Randy.
Owl comes over to him for attention and talks to him, quite a major
step for the elusive Owl.  Mind you, Randy is the soul of gentleness
and wonderful with animals, so that helps.

========
Sat, 03 Aug 2002 00:33:38 GMT

Tribble managed to turn my computer off, totally off -- not once, but
twice.  He was sleeping next to the APC (battery back-up unit) and hit
the off switch with his foot.

You'd think I would have been smart enough to move him the first time,
right?  Wrong.  First, moving Tribble is a no-win proposition.  You
move him.  He comes back.  You move him.  He comes back.  You move
him...and he's such a sweet cat that I can't bring myself to get truly
irritated with him.

But the second time around, I *did* move him.  He's currently right
back in the same spot. I've put something in front of the off switch.
Sigh...

And of course, both times I was on-line in the middle of writing long,
complex emails and dealing with meeting a deadline, then have to
suddenly sit through rebooting, running scandisk, etc.

Cats.

========
Tue, 13 Aug 2002 18:48:53 GMT

THE MORNING ROUTINE

As I enter the office, cats race for the door to get outside.

I turn on the computer.  While it's booting up, I give Querida her
morning pill, dump out the water bowl, wipe it clean it and fill it
with fresh water.

I start the dial-up procedure. While that's happening (which for some
reason, takes a long time on my machine), I sweep the floor around the
cat boxes.

I open Eudora and start downloading my email.  While that's happening,
I clean the cat boxes.

With all the cat tasks done, I sit down contentedly to read email.
Whereupon Tosca races in from the outside, jumps onto my desk and
shakes herself.  Ten pounds of fine, gritty dirt settles upon the desk
and keyboard.  Cat is hastily, but gently (so as not to shake off more
dust) lifted to the ground and told to go shake herself somewhere
else.  Keyboard is turned upsidedown and shaken.  Desk is wiped off.

And so it goes.

========
Thu, 15 Aug 2002 04:36:54 GMT

You know how often you see someone in a movie or tv show who has bad
dream and sits bolt upright in bed?  I always laugh at that bit of
nonsense.  It's so overdone and far from reality.

Except I did it the other night.  What made me sit boltupright to
startled wakefulness at 3 am was the sound of Unicom and Nefreet
having a vicious altercation.  Except that once I was upright and
awake, I didn't hear a beep anywhere in the house.  Silent as the
tomb.  I could NOT figure out whether something had actually happened
or I'd had a dream about it.  I did see the humor in doing what I what
I would laugh about if on tv.

However, during the course of the next afternoon and evening, Randy
found and removed no less than three claws sheaths that were stuck
into Unicom's skin and fur on his head and neck area.  Plus he has
bloody scab on the inside of one ear.  So I think it's safe to say
they had a nasty, but brief tiff and I really did have a good reason
to bolt awake.


For years, I nurtured along a poor little peach tree that I inherited
with my house.  It struggled and barely managed to produce a few small
peaches, but I kept it going.  Then Randy took over and spent the last
year waging a losing battle with the damned gophers who were
destroying the tree's roots.  The gophers won and the tree is dead.

Today, Randy had his revenge.  He was watering near the tree and lots
of water was going into the gopher holes.  A soggy gopher poked his
head up.  Randy waited, poured in more water, waited and sure enough,
the gopher finally popped out of the ground and made a run for it.

Randy stomped the sucker good!  Then he gave it to Unicom.  Uni was
quite happy to have a fresh, if waterlogged, gopher treat.

========
Fri, 16 Aug 2002 04:22:32 GMT

Theseus decided to make a jump for my desk, but for one of those
inexplicable reasons known only to cats, he must have changed his mind
right around the same time he sent the signal to his legs to jump.

As a consequence, about half the command to jump got through and he
fell short.  He grasped desperately with his front paws at my desktop,
but found nothing he could grip onto.  He slid butt-first into my
large wastebasket, which then majestically toppled over to spill
Theseus and half the contents across the floor. 

It was rather like watching a slow-motion disaster, but I was laughing
too hard to do anything about it.

========
Fri, 16 Aug 2002 17:44:51 GMT

Sigh...5 am I had to leap out of bed, jolted from sleep once again,
stagger into the living room and break up a fight between Unicom and
Nefreet.  Uni strolled over trying to look innocent, except that his
tail was PUFFED OUT TO HERE.  I checked them out to make sure no
damage was done before staggering back to bed.

What with Nefreet being a petite psycho and Uni being a big tough guy,
there's no hope for peace between those two.

========
Sat, 17 Aug 2002 05:02:12 GMT

We had a lot more excitement than we bargained for after dinner.

It was full dark because we ate late, and we stepped out onto the
patio to give Unicom some petting.  He likes to hang out on the far
corner of patio.  He came over and he petted him up, then he moved
closer to the steps to the back deck.

We started for the back steps when I noticed Uni was suddenly behaving
as though deeply alarmed, with his attention toward the corner of the
house.  We stopped at the bottom of the steps and listened.
Immediately to Randy's left and adjacent to the steps and corner of
the house, is our huge outdoor combination A/C-heating unit that was
running.  It makes quite a bit of noise, but I quickly picked up
another sound running in tandem with it.  It's a sound I've heard many
times before, the sound of a pissed off rattlesnake.  The shadows were
too dark to make out anything.

I went to pick up Uni and bring him inside.  Big mistake.  Uni was NOT
going to held, not matter what tactics I tried.  He was in full-blown
panic mode, claws flailing.  Now I knew for sure that I was right.  I
called for Randy to run for his gun and flashlight.  I lost my hold on
Uni after he nailed me several times in the arm, after which he ran
off.

I dashed into the house, grabbed the large flashlight as Randy came up
with his .22 pistol loaded with snakeshot (I also keep a .22 pistol
loaded with snakeshot, but one was enough). 

We went down the steps, keeping a safer distance this time.  There's a
small space between the house and the A/C unit, with a large metal
connector that has a cozy little space beneath it.  There he was,
curled up and shaking his tail in full wrath.  He could have easily
struck and bitten Randy when we were standing there before, and Randy
wearing shorts and no shoes.

I held the beam on him while Randy carefully pumped three shots into
its head, having to find an angle that wouldn't damage the equipment
the rattler was next to.

He measured exactly 3 feet from snout to tip, with 8 rattles and
button.  Far from the biggest I've ever dealt with, but big enough.
Randy located Uni hanging around down at my office, still pretty
freaked out, so we're leaving him alone to calm down.  But it does
answer something we've been wondering about.  Lately, we've seen him
react several times to electrical cords or anything large and
snake-like lying on the floor.  He's been pausing and batting very
apprehensively at it before moving on.  We've speculated that he might
have had a close encounter with a snake recently.

As for me, the inside of my right arm at the elbow looks like a battle
field.  In one place, it looks like a very clumsy nurse tried to take
blood from the vein, missed by a hair and left a big puncture wound
behind.  It hurt like hell when Uni did it and only feels slightly
better now. 

But that's okay  It's the second time I've been saved from a potential
rattlesnake bite by a cat.  Uni did good.

========
Sat, 17 Aug 2002 22:31:53

Unicom remained a very spooked boy for the rest of the evening and
even this morning.  He was extremely dubious of Randy's feet and kept
checking to make sure they were really a part of Randy's body.  Last
night, any strange sound or sudden movement would spook him.  This
morning, he spooked when Randy poured more food into his bowl.

Good thing he's not a horse I had to ride.

Now had Zorro or Achilles been there, they would have done the Dance
of Death with the rattler and killed it.  I sure do miss those cats.
I even dreamt about Achilles last night.  I dreamt I found him and
brought him home again.  Sigh...

========
Tue, 20 Aug 2002 11:39:02

Unicom continues to have problems telling that our feet belong to us.

Randy and I were sitting on the sofa with Uni between us.  I did
something I don't usually do and tucked my foot up under one knee.
This left my big toe sticking out.  Uni have been peacefully dozing
when he suddenly spotted my toe and decided it was an Unknown Entity
of Dangerous Intent.  He sat up and whacked it a couple of times.

I decided to relieve Uni's anxiety by moving my foot so that he could
see it was, indeed, only my foot.  But as I brought my foot across,
Uni reared up, hissed and leapt over the back of the sofa.

We were hysterical.  We tried to coax him back, but he just looked at
us with big, round eyes and was even nervous about Randy's hands.

Hysterical laughing aside, though, I find it slightly worrisome to
have him react in such an extreme manner.  He's never done that
before.  It's led us to theorize he could be suffering a form of
post-traumatic stress, though I wonder what could have caused him that
much trauma without us being aware of it.

========
Thu, 22 Aug 2002 22:35:17

I've decided I need to get Querida to the vet as soon as I can manage.
I want my long-time, beloved vet to see her.  This time I'm not going
to settle for anyone else.

Lately, Querida's been drinking excessive amounts of water.  She'll
lie next to the water bowl, with her chin resting on the edge, and
drink and drink.  That could be a sign of kidney trouble, diabetes, or
who knows what.  She is, after all, quite an old girl.  There are a
few other things that need to be looked at as well.

Poor Querida.  She *hates* the carrier and gets stressed out from it.
She's a cat that has never ever liked to be caged or restrained.

========
Fri, 23 Aug 2002 15:45:06

Querida went to the vet, vocalizing vociferously the entire way.  She
also panted and drooled excessively from the stress.  I carried her
into the vet's office where she proceeded to make eardrums flinch.
Her voice is a blend of a Siamese yowl and an enraged duck.  A woman
walked in off the street and pleaded us to do something for that poor
cat.  It was truly a performance of high pathos.

The most likely answer is exactly what I expected--not quite the right
dose on the thyroid meds.  Querida's lost about a pound since I had
her there last in March, and I could tell she was losing weight.  The
blood work showed no kidney problems, no diabetes, but elevated liver
functions, which she also had back in Feb. when I first brought her
in.  That points toward the thyroid problem.   

The test for thyroid had to be sent out, so we won't have the results
for that until next week.  I'm guessing she needs just a bit more of
the thyroid medication than she's getting now.

She also has a couple of fairly rotten teeth that need to be removed
which would account for her running eyes and nose problems (underlying
irritation), but neither the vet nor I am willing to risk that
procedure on her at this point.  Querida is a 16 year old cat, after
all, so being put under is risky.  Once we get her stabilized (and I
get caught up on the blasted vet bill), I'll think about getting the
teeth removed.

========
Sat, 24 Aug 2002 11:55:18

The blasted moggies managed to knock my scanner off the desk.  This
isn't a small object, it's a full-sized tabletop HP scanner.  I found
it lying upside-down on the floor.

HP makes them tough, I guess.  It's still working.  But some cat had
to work pretty hard to get this thing all the way onto the floor.
Maybe one of the hefties, like Artemis, used it for a launching pad in
a moment of panic.

I'd like someone to hire me to design a line of cat-proof desks.  Lots
of protective areas for equipment and additional space purely for cats
to sleep in where they won't interfere with the equipment.

Of course, cats being cats, they'll sleep anywhere except where you
want them to.

========
Sat, 24 Aug 2002 17:54:16

Now for some light amusement, I've added a new page to the Moggy Horde
site:  The Silly Sleeping Pose Olympics.

Come join the contest!

http://www.christymarx.com/moggy/olympics.htm

========
Sun, 25 Aug 2002 21:02:18

I replenished the bird feeder this morning.  As is my custom, I also
leave piles of bird seed on the patio for the blue jays and other
birds that don't use the feeder.

This morning, Unicom decided to sample the bird seed and find out
whether it made a good cat snack.  He looked amusing with bird seed on
his nose.  I shooed him away from it, but I don't think he found it
very interesting anyway.

This evening, after dusk, we looked out to see a bunny snacking on the
bird seed.  No wonder we have so many bold bunnies around the yard
this year.  I didn't realize I was feeding them, too!

========
Mon, 26 Aug 2002 21:20:37

The vet called early this morning to let me know the results of
Querida's thyroid test.  As we had both anticipated, her thyroid
levels were far too high.  Lucky me, I have to start giving her meds
*twice* a day.  That will be so much fun...

Owl's trying to sleep on the blasted escape key again.  That's because
Tosca's sleeping in his usual spot on the other side of the keyboard.
Sly has occupied the printer.  Theseus is sprawled alongside the
scanner.  Querida and Kate are behind my chair.  I'm in here
somewhere.

Many years back, a friend of mine, Bridget McKenna, gave
me the most wonderful picture.  It's an illustration by Gorey.  In the
center, a person sits working at an old fashioned typewriter.  You
can't tell if this person is male or female because a large cat is
draped over his/her shoulder, obscuring the face.  Another cal is
sprawled on top of papers on the desk, one sits on more paper, one is
pulling papers off the desk, one is standing up on the back of the
chair to look out the window, two more sleep on a bookcase nearby and
a picture of a cat hangs on the wall.

I can so relate to this illustration.

========
Fri, 30 Aug 2002 21:28:53

Poor Unicom continues to be a badly spooked boy.  The other night we
couldn't find him when it was bedtime.  Randy and I were outside with
flashlights calling him and searching everywhere.  This is the sort of
thing I'm used to, but turns Randy into a nervous wreck.

Randy finally found Uni way up the oak tree next to the patio.  We
coaxed him down and brought him in.  Since he's not the type to go up
a tree for no particular reason, something must have given him a
serious fright.  He's been much less inclined to go out and stay out
at night for the past couple of evenings.  It could be one of the dogs
from down below.  They do wander up the hill sometimes.

========
Wed, 04 Sep 2002 22:00:23 -0700

I had a very strange bout with Artemis.  I only saw the cats briefly
this morning, just enough to give them fresh water, give Querida her
pill and clean the boxes.

When I got back and came down here around 8:30 pm, I got the usual
greetings from a happy horde.  Then I began to hear a cat crying in
distress.  I tracked it down to Artemis, cowering in a dark, protected
corner behaving as though she were terrified and had no idea who I
was.  It was deeply unsettling.

I couldn't coax her to me.  When I went toward her, she would try to
escape, then retreat to her corner.  I very gently talked to her and
gave her scritchies which she quite seemed to appreciate.  I couldn't
see an injury, but she wasn't going to budge either.

I finally decided to leave her alone for a while.  It's been about an
hour and she's finally lying out in the middle of the room in one of
her usual places and looking her normal self.  In fact, when she saw
me looking at her, she gave me her usual mrow-wow-wow and headed this
way.

I sure wish I knew what that fit of fear was all about.

========
Fri, 06 Sep 2002 21:31:39 -0700

I opened the sliding glass door in the living room to let Uni in.  The
door peeled up a long, thin strip of something (silicone or whatever)
which curled up across the threshhold.

Uni did a double-take.  He verrrrry carefully checked out that snake.
With slow intent, he investigated.  With one lightning strike of his
paw, he killed the snake.  He make sure it was good and dead before he
strolled inside.  I removed the "snake" and praised Uni, the Mighty
Snake Killer.

========
Mon, 09 Sep 2002 11:58:05 -0700

Nefreet left us three gifts yesterday.  I suspect both were a way of
letting me know how much she hated getting her weekly anti-allergen
rubdown.   One was a nice, juicy hairball.  The second was the lower
half of a lizard on the kitchen floor.  The third was the upper half
of the lizard along with all the cat food she'd eaten earlier in the
day.  Ah, yes, cats.

Cats is a four letter word.

========
Wed, 11 Sep 2002 14:51:18 -0700

Tosca seems to have set herself up as the alpha-female.  She's become
quite bossy.  Her favorite trick of late is to attack the tail of
another cat as it lies minding its own business on my desk.  When said
cat takes umbrage, Tosca clearly feels entitled to wallop away.  In
self-defense, of course.

========
Wed, 11 Sep 2002 22:40:27 -0700

Argh...either the young tabby-boy has returned (the one I had fixed)
or yet another stray cat has shown up.  I haven't gotten a good enough
look to determine which is the case.

Uni was pulling his usual Finnegan routine tonight where he comes in
for a few quick bites of food, then goes out, then comes in, then goes
out.  We call it the "in-again-out-again-Finnegan".

Anyway, I was about to let him out onto the back deck when he began to
growl.  I spotted a dark tabby-type cat disappearing under the deck.
The reason I have my doubts is that it seemed to have two very white
back feet and a fluffy tail.  The other tabby-boy didn't.  However, it
was somewhat dark and I didn't have my glasses on, so I could be wrong
about my impression.

We've kept Uni inside rather than risk him getting into a fight.  I'm
keeping my eyes open for the stray.

========
Thu, 12 Sep 2002 21:49:42 -0700

Here I am with a perfectly large desk with nice, flat spaces and I'm
looking around for a place to put my papers.

That's because the nice flat spaces are filled with nice, sleeping
cats.  Do I move the nice, sleeping cats?  Of course not.  I keep
looking for some other non-existent place for my papers...

========
Fri, 13 Sep 2002 14:49:25 -0700

Bast has had her way with me again.  This time, she worked with the
most cunning deviousness, a slow build-up and a twist ending.

The stray tabby-boy, the one I had fixed months ago, has made the
occasional appearance, including a couple nights back.  He's a
brown/black/tan tabby with a little bit of a white chin.  I really
liked this cat from the beginning because he was such a sociable,
affectionate and apparently good-natured cat.  But I made Randy a
solemn promise -- no more cats.

So you can imagine my total shock when Randy went out onto the front
porch after lunch and came back inside carrying tabby-boy.  The cat
was trapped on the porch by Uni who was ready to defend his territory.

Randy carried him into the back hall so we could close the door and
keep him confined.  Tabby-boy was totally relaxed and wildly
affectionate.  He had some of the cat food we keep in an extra bowl on
top of the dryer, then rolled around and purred and made an adorable
spectacle of himself.  We noticed his tail has an oddly triangular
shape rather than being round like most cat tails.  Poor Randy was
already suffering asthma and allergic reactions from petting the
stray.  But once the cat turned his big, green, hypnotic eyes on
Randy, it was all over.

"I can't believe I'm saying this, but do you think he'd get along with
your other cats?"

I could hear Bast's evil chortle of triumph.

He seems to have quite a Puckish nature, so his name for the moment is
Puck.  We'll see if it sticks.

I don't think Puck wanted Randy to leave.  As soon as Randy closed the
door behind him, Puck went into a frenzy of leg rubbing, toe-biting
and made an impulsive swipe at my face that left me with a couple of
minor scratches on the inside of my lip.  

I carried him down to my office, having gotten the rest of the Horde
inside and closed the cat door.  We're now going through the usual
round of yowling, wailing, hissing and fussing that is the initiation
process.  Puck instantly found himself a cave-like spot in a set of
shelves next to the cat food where he has curled up.  He yowls and
hisses if anyone gets too close, but other than that, he doesn't seem
too bothered.  I go over and pet him every ten minutes or so.

The other cats are having their usual range of reactions from
curiosity to bafflement.  They're keeping their distance.  It's been
pretty peaceful so far.  Mind you, this is only the start.  Puck will
have to come out to eat, drink and use the cat box eventually and
that's when the real fun begins.

This puts me back up to 14 cats.  No longer a coven.  The toughest
part is that I'll have to keep the cat door closed and keep Puck
inside for at least a couple of weeks, or he'll simply run off the
first chance he gets.  Then he'll show up again and maybe get into a
fight with Uni and so on and so forth.  That means also keeping most
of the other cats inside and cautiously letting them in and out
myself without letting Puck get out.

I just hope they don't destroy my office during the night.

========
Fri, 13 Sep 2002 20:59:20 -0700

I had to go into town for a few hours.  When I got back, everything
was the same down here.  Puck was in his "cave" and the rest of the
cats were leaving him alone.

When I went to see him, Puck came out and rolled around on my feet and
did figure-8's around my legs.  He's not really intimidated by much.
He wasn't at all bothered when I swept the floor around him.  He still
yowls and hisses at any other cat that gets within three feet of him.
I've put some food and water near his cave, separate from the other
food and water, until he gets more settled in.

Randy came down to see how Puck was doing and Puck did the whole wild
affection thing for him, too.  Poor Sly made the mistake of wandering
over to say hello to Randy.  Puck jumped up and chased Sly halfway
across the office.  I hope this aggression phase doesn't last too long
or cause a spate of abscesses.

Now that I'm back at the desk, Puck has returned to his cave.  It's
quiet, for the moment.

========
Sat, 14 Sep 2002 11:27:09 -0700

When I came into the office this morning, I let a few cats dart
outside then looked around for Mr. Puck.  I finally found him lounging
on top of a box on the highest shelf in the office, a favorite
lounging spot of several of the cats.

He came readily over to me, but Diva was on top of another section of
the shelves.  They had a face-off.  I think she was only curious, but
Puck is still in defensive mode so they hissed.  I patted a couple of
lower shelves on a workbench right next to the shelves he was on.
He's a smart boy.  He got the idea instantly and bounced on down to
the workbench where I gave him lots of attention.

But he also turned and attacked Diva, driving her back across the
shelves.  He makes a lightning fast lunge and a swipe with a front paw
when he does this.  Not enough to do serious damage, but enough that I
will have to keep a close watch for face abscesses in case one claw
connects.  I checked Diva out later and she seems fine.

However, I'm also severely chastising him every time he shows
aggression to the other cats.  When he was on the floor, I could see
that he was going to make a lunch at Artemis, so I held onto the end
of his tail.  The amazing thing is that he *let* me.  He didn't growl
at me or turn and attack me.  He let me hold him in check.  It's a
rare cat who would allow that from someone he hardly knows at all.

I saw him use the cat box, to his relief as well as mine, I'm sure.
He hung out next to me while I was cleaning the cat boxes, though he
did wallop Blue who made the mistake of getting too close.  Actually,
I don't mind if he wallops Blue.  Blue has been a bully and needs
someone to keep him in line.  I can easily see Puck becoming the alpha
male in spite of being only about a year and a half old and not very
big.  He's all long, lean sinew at this point.

I'm guessing from his reactions that he's led a rough and tumble life.
He must be accustomed to having to fight for everything he gets.

He did make one run for the door when I was letting cats in and out,
but wasn't frantic about it.  He's eating from the main food bowls, so
I've done away with having special food and water in a separate
location.

Shortly after I sat down to do email, the Puckster discovered my desk.
He came and rubbed my legs and hung around at the base of my chair.  I
had to discipline him a few times about not attacking Querida or Owl.
Then he discovered the top of my desk.  He rubbed up the monitor,
sniffed around, plopped down on one side of the desk, got into my lap
and tickled my chin with his tail, started to growl and hiss at Kate
who was sleeping on the printer, but I put a stop to that.

A few minutes later, in a sign of great progress, he settled down
between the keyboard and monitor.  Kate had relocated to the left side
of my keyboard, so they were now almost nose to nose, maybe less than
a foot away, and there was no trouble.  Mind you, I was there to make
sure of that, but it's still progress.  Kate decided not to push her
luck after about five minutes and left.

Now Puck has curled up on the printer as though he owns the damn
place, which I suppose he does, and is having a nice bath.

I should mention that Randy has made it clear that he only broke the
"no more cats" rule because Puck is clearly a unique and wonderful
moggy, not some ordinary old cat. <g>

========
Sat, 14 Sep 2002 21:51:33 -0700

Slowly, slowly Puck is getting settled in.  He seems to be accepting
Kate more easily than the others.  Maybe she looks like mom?

I notice he has the most aggressive reaction to the black cats -- to
Sly, Tosca, Diva and Knobby.  My guess is that he had a nemesis that
was a black cat.

Puck is pretty defensive with Owl and Theseus, though I suspect that
may be a matter of their large size seeming like a threat.  Poor
Theseus has gone into self-imposed exile off in some cranny of the
office.

While I've been at the computer tonight, Puck slept on the desk next
to the keyboard and has now shifted over to the printer.  If somebody
wanted to design the ideal cat bed, all she would have to do is make a
mold of the top of this flat-top HP printer.  Every one of my cats
loves to sleep on it.  Yes, it has a nice heavy plastic dustcover over
it.

Randy came down earlier to spend some time visiting Puck.  Puck was
ecstatic to see him and rolled around at his feet and charged at any
other cat that dared to get near.  MY HUMAN, MINE!!!  What a
performance.  Puck does a half-somersault where he tucks his head
under and his butt up, then plops over onto his side on top of one's
foot.  Randy stayed as long as he could (which is about 5 minutes).
Puck did the same thing he did yesterday when Randy left -- he got all
crazed and bit my toes!  It must be his way of letting me know he's
not happy that Randy goes away.

========
Sun, 15 Sep 2002 11:04:05 -0700

Things are remarkably peaceful this morning.  There are still the
occasional flare-ups, but they grow fewer and less vociferous.  I saw
Puck do some fairly close mingling this morning with no hissing on
either side.

I think Querida finally realized this morning that there's a strange
cat around.  She's been rather oblivious to the whole thing up until
now.  Poor old girl.  It's possible she's entirely deaf by now.  I
can't quite tell for sure.  At the very least, her hearing is
impaired.

Puck was exploring the office, but now he's curled up immediately to
my right.  He sure is a sweet boy.

========
Sun, 15 Sep 2002 13:57:12 -0700

Puck is looney.  He gets crazed for attention to the point where I can
hardly walk around the office because he's throwing himself on top of
my feet and biting my toes.  

He chased Blue into hiding.  I reprimanded Puck for that, but I don't
mind if he stays dominant over Blue.

Then the merry Puckster decided to balance on the back of my office
chair and lean on my neck.  After which he sort of slide down between
my back and the chair and savaged my pony tail.

The rest of the office Horde is not terribly happy at the moment, but
this is only day 3.  Things should settle down soon.

========
Sun, 15 Sep 2002 22:20:04 -0700

I wish I had someone down here with a camera to get a photo of this
nutso cat perched on my shoulder, nibbling my ear.  Maybe I should
rename him Casanova.

========
Mon, 16 Sep 2002 21:27:56 -0700

I had a pilling contest with Owl last night.  Owl won.  Every night
for nearly two weeks, he has obligingly taken the anti-histamine, but
last night Puck was right there and Owl became completely
uncooperative.  I tried to get that pill down his throat about five
times, nearly losing a finger in the process.  By then, the bitterness
of the pill made Owl foam.  Long, ropes of drool poured from his
mouth.  I gave up.

Puck's acceptance in the Horde is proceeding well.  It was one step
quieter today.  When I came down this morning, Puck was up in Diva's
favorite spot, the place where she almost always hangs out.  He came
bouncing across the cat bridge as though he's done it a thousand
times.

When I came down after lunch, he was on top of another set of shelves
hanging out very close to Knobby.  No significant spats took place, at
least not while I was here.  He hangs out close to me, his preferred
place being between the monitor and the keyboard.  I'm beginning the
"don't step on the keyboard" lessons.  He also decided that lying on
top of my mouse was wonderful...even if I happened to be using it at
the time.  I've had to move him three or four times from that spot.
He likes my lap, too.

Mid-afternoon, one of my rotten moggies knocked a large box down from
the top of some bookshelves.  It was large box filled with styrofoam
packing stuff, like the peanuts except more squarish.  There is now a
large pile of styrofoam packing stuff on the floor and a million
pieces of packing stuff EVERYWHERE, like a styrofoam blizzard has
descended upon me.

I am steadfastly ignoring it, in the vain hope it will somehow
evaporate or being carried off by fairies.

========
Tue, 17 Sep 2002 12:01:37 -0700

Owl is back to taking his pill nicely.  I'm relieved, because I think
this treatment is actually working.  I must thank Judy Tarr for this.
I recently exchanged email with her and she mentioned having a cat who
pulled his fur out.  Her vet managed to stop it with a combination of
Prednisone and Chlor-Trimetron.

I tried various Pred regimes with Owl to no effect.  And I even had my
vet recommend the Chlor-Trimetron for Querida.  But it never occurred
to me to try it on Owl.  So I've been giving him one every night for
going on two weeks.  And by damn, I think it's working!  It takes a
while for the fur to grow back, so it will be another couple of weeks
before I can be positive.  But I sure hope it works and he gets his
gorgeous coat back.

Meanwhile, things are quiet in the Horde as the moggies slowly relax
and accept Puck.

But the damn styrofoam chips are still there.  And there. And there
and there and there and OVER THERE.  They're proliferating!  Argh.

========
Wed, 18 Sep 2002 12:06:11 -0700

Years of experience have taught me not to get bodily parts in the way
of cats whacking at one another, but I do it anyway.  Things seemed to
be going so well.  Puck and the other cats have calmed down a lot, but
I think it's mostly still on the surface with tensions lurking beneath
the shallow calm.

Puck was on the desk when Sly came over to say hello.  I was delighted
to see Puck present his head in a friendly fashion to Sly.  They
rubbed heads and sniffed a little bit.  Puck laid down while I petted
Sly.  Everything seemed fine.  Then a couple of minutes later with no
warning, Puck suddenly attacked Sly.  I instinctively threw my hand in
there to stop it.  Poor Sly vaporized to elsewhere.  I castigated Puck
while nursing my sore hand.

I have a couple of minor scratches, which are no big deal at all.  But
Puck must have gotten a claw tip into a nerve and damaged it.  By the
time I got to the gym in the afternoon, it hurt like hell to close my
hand or make a fist.  The area on the back of my hand around the
second knuckle was swollen and painful.

It's about fifty percent better this morning, but it still hurts.  I
think I'm going to find a time when Puck is nice and relaxed and trim
back his front claws until he stops lashing out unexpectedly like
that.

========
Wed, 18 Sep 2002 21:35:58 -0700

It's official.  Puck now has his own webpage.

For a view of the Puckster, click on his cute face on the Moggy Horde
page:

http://www.christymarx.com/moggy/horde.htm

========
Thu, 19 Sep 2002 17:45:22 -0700

Poor, long-suffering Kate.  She was lying to the right of the keyboard
while Puck is lying in "his" spot between the keyboard and the
monitor.  So he started to play with her tail.

Kate gave me the most pathetic look.  It was a look that said,
"Mooommm, look what he's doing!"  She got up, readjusted herself, laid
down, whereupon Puck began to play with her tail again.  Another
pathetic look.  She got up, etc.  This happened about four times.  By
the third time, Kate opened her mouth AND MADE A SOUND.  She was so
aggrieved, she actually complained out loud.  This is Kate of the
Silent Meow, the girl who never utters a word. She finally gave up and
went elsewhere for her nap.

Owl has come to take her place.  The tip of his tail is flicking mere
inches from Puck's nose.  Luckily for all concerned, Puck is now
asleep.

========
Thu, 19 Sep 2002 21:34:15 -0700

Puck is learning his way around the office equipment.  He hasn't quite
gotten the message about the keyboard yet.  I was trying to do a quick
update on a webpage when a cascade of actions happened, thanks to Puck
stretching his legs.

I used my CD burner a lot today.  He thought that was fascinating.  He
sat and listened to it with his big ears perked toward the sound.

The printer, however, has him slightly flummoxed.  He's not quite sure
what he thinks of that, as he watches paper disappear in one slot and
slide out the top.

He has no qualms about chasing a ball, however.  He knew instantly
what chasing a ball was about.  ZOOOOMMMM!

========
Fri, 20 Sep 2002 21:59:41 -0700

Puck is chasing Sly around the office.  I *think* he might be trying
to play, but Sly's been whacked by Puck too many times to be playful
about it.

The Puckster is full of energy and needs an outlet.  I wish Diva would
learn to play with him.  She's as wired as he is.  They'd be hell on
wheels if they got going as playmates.

========
Sat, 21 Sep 2002 11:05:39 -0700

Puck is working out his energy by savaging one of the cat beds.
Mischief incarnate.

========
Tue, 24 Sep 2002 11:09:30 -0700

I'm sitting here minding my own business when I suddenly find cat paws
wrapped around my neck and clinging to my ears.  Puck decided to jump
up from the floor onto the back of my neck.  I count myself lucky he
didn't entirely shred my ears in the process.

He has too much energy to be bottled up inside, but I'm not ready to
let him outside yet.  I want him thoroughly acclimated and settled in
before I risk that.

Though things are generally pretty calm, Puck still has a bad habit of
suddenly attacking one of the other cats.  He chased Artemis around
yesterday.  This morning, he jumped on Knobby.  That could have turned
into a real fight if I hadn't been here to intervene.  I have some
work ahead of me to break him of his bad habits. [p;;;;;;;;;

Hmmm...I think Puck was trying to spell his name there...or it's his
editorial comment on bad habits.

========
A BIG CHANGE

As of today, 26 Sept. 2002, I have shifted the Tales of the Moggy Horde over to
 a blog format.  You may have found your way here from the Moggyblog, but if you
 haven't, here's the link for it.  This is where the Tales will be posted from 
now on.

http://www.christymarx.com/moggy/blog.htm